The Balanced Homeschooler
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OBSERVATIONS from a balanced homeschooler

Christ is risen!

3/25/2013

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Most of us will find ourselves involved in one or two Easter egg hunts this weekend along with attending a special Easter service at our respective places of worship.  Yet, sometimes, this is a holiday that comes and goes so fast we realize that we may not have taken the opportunity to discuss the important points of the holiday with our children.  After all, we spend so much time focusing on the birth of Christ and generally not much time at all celebrating the primary foundation of our faith; namely the death, burial, and resurrection of our Lord, Jesus Christ.  So, as Easter quickly approaches, I encourage you to think about the family traditions you practice in your home that will help to highlight the important points.

One of the things we do every year on Good Friday is to watch "The Miracle Maker: The Story of Jesus" with our boys.  It is a high-quality Claymation production with an all-star voice-talent cast.  Appropriate for all ages, the story follows the major aspects of Jesus' ministry; from the beginning right through His death, burial, resurrection, and ascension.  Often times, we will pause the film and discuss points and answer questions along the way.  See the thumbnail link on this page to purchase your own copy through our store.
Another thing that the boys enjoy doing is talking through our "Resurrection Eggs".  Ours is a homemade kit, but you can also purchase them pre-made.  All you need is an egg container that you save from putting in the recycle that holds at least 12 eggs (18 eggs if you want to find that many symbolic objects). Then make sure you have a different color of plastic Easter egg (regular size) to place in each slot; making sure to have a white one that will remain empty for the last one.  See the thumbnail link on this page to purchase a pre-made one through our store.
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One other idea is to bake resurrection cookies.  Various ingredients represent different parts of the Easter account and the cookies are left in the oven overnight.  Some families even choose to "seal" their oven with tape.  Then when the cookies are taken out in the morning, they are hollow or "empty" on the inside, just like when Jesus rose from the grave!  Here is one recipe, but there are several variations out there you can try: http://www.motherhoodonadime.com/kids/resurrection-cookies-printable-recipe/.
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WORKING OUT THE WEED

3/19/2013

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During one of our many walks to and from the NIH for daily labs and treatments last summer, Evan and I observed a large weed that was taking over one of the beautiful flower gardens in front of the Children's Inn.  He bent over and started searching around for the very base of the weed and then it took A LOT of effort to pull the whole thing out by the roots!  We did not realize how deeply embedded it was or how large it was until he started to force it out.  The proof is in the photos!

Isn't that the way spiritual roadblocks and character issues are with our kids?  We see something that is a little concerning and wind up realizing that it is just the tip of the iceberg; that something much deeper has taken root in our child's heart.  Having one of those moments can be very discouraging.  After all, we are pouring every resource we have into our child's life and think, "Really?  How did THAT get there?"

But take heart, moms.  Remember that there is no issue that can stand up to the power of praying parents who are tuned into the ongoing needs of their family.  Also remember that the enemy attacks often times when he sees the good work you are doing in the lives of your children, so take heart when you face all kinds of trials.  Sound familiar? (James 1:2-5)

When character or behavioral issues crop up, remember that loving consistency and appropriate discipline are best used as a package deal. 
  • Always reinforce your love for your child while making sure they understand the boundaries that must be respected.  Even when mistakes are made they are ALWAYS your child whom you love even if you are correcting their behavior.  In fact it is because you love them that you discipline them in order to repair your FELLOWSHIP with them.  Yet your RELATIONSHIP with them is never broken. 
  • Stay the course and be consistent in whatever the issue is that needs to be addressed.  It is especially critical that your child receives the same feedback and interaction from mom as they do from dad.  It is also important that children be given the same boundaries at the appropriate ages.  Decide in advance what rules are universal for all of your children and which ones may vary depending on the age of the child so that there is consistency among the siblings as well.
  • Do the work to figure out where this behavior is coming from.  Just like the weed in the photo, if you just trim off the visible part of the problem (i.e. the outward behavior) without addressing the inward heart issues (i.e. the root system), the problem has not been fully addressed and may come manifest itself in a more severe way in the near future.

​Remember that certain heart issues will resolve themselves over time while others need a concerted plan to address them.  Either way, as you homeschool your children look for opportunities to work on these "heart problems" as they arise.  Sometimes it is better to set the academics aside (they are probably not listening or doing what they need to do for school at that moment anyway!) until these types of problems are identified and acknowledged so that improvement or even healing can be more quickly achieved.
Read The Power of a Praying Parent by Stormie O'Martian to help both you and your spouse focus on a variety of different priorities for your child's overall well-being and development. The chapters can easily be covered over the course of one month.  Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp is also a great resource for parents to utilize.
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be Intentional: Enjoin Your Children to the Right Adults

3/15/2013

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One of the primary reasons many of us homeschool is to model healthy relationships and behaviors to our children.  This is why we laugh at the idea of the "s" word being a problem in this current generation of the home education choice. Our reply to this concern may go something like this...

"Socialization?  We modern homeschoolers are not worried about socialization because we know that homeschooled and homebound are NOT interchangeable terms!  In fact socialization is one of the important reasons why we are homeschooling.  We want to make sure our children interact with different groups of kids throughout the week and that they become comfortable in communicating with younger ones, adults, and seniors alike.  We want them to experience a variety of social circumstances in real world settings."


Yet sometimes there is an interesting dynamic in the homeschool community when it comes to the involvement of other adults in our children's lives.  We are sometimes all too quick to drop them off at a community center class, sports club practice, co-op learning group, church class, or private music lesson when we may not even know the name of the adult in charge.  Remember that these types of adults are influencing our children in a significant and usually regular way.  So it is important that we connect with them eye-to-eye before making a decision to enjoin our children to them for a season. 

I have made sure to do this with our boys' soccer and physical education coaches as well as the folks who work with our boys regularly in their various church activities.  While you want your children to gain the benefit of working with a variety of personalities and learning the skills that they have to offer your children, it is vital that you are leaving them in the care of people who will support your efforts and come alongside you in reinforcing the principles of life that are important to you.  We don't want to just be interested in our kids having their time occupied, but that the time they spend there is an extension of what you are reinforcing with them in the home.

Recently, I went through a two-month long journey to engage a new piano teacher for our boys.  Our beloved "Miss Cindy", their piano teacher of nine years, had retired and was just helping us along until we could find a new situation.  I interviewed several potential teachers and the boys also had several sample lessons with four different possible instructors before we made a decision on a new teacher who is not only excellent at the technical aspects of teaching piano, but also connects personally with the boys and understands the struggle that they have had with long breaks in their practice history.  They are being challenged, rather than penalized, in a nurturing environment as they move from one methodology to another (i.e. Suzuki method to traditional) in a way that acknowledges their strengths while identifying their goals.  Most of all, their new instructor is a Christian who empathizes with their unique situation of having just lost their older brother to cancer.  Now we can move ahead with confidence that we are creating a bond with their new teacher that will complement our family’s goals for the long term.  I must also mention that Cindy, their former teacher, has grown to be one of my very closest personal friends.  Even though she does not formally teach them piano any longer, she has been, is, and will continue to be a huge part of our life.  So, it is a win-win all the way around when "adult enjoinment" is intentionally planned. 

Bottom line: Where we are so careful to make sure they have healthy peer relationships and social interactions with a variety of individuals and friends, we need to be just as prudent to the other important adults that play a role in our children's lives.  Pastors, coaches, tutors, and private instructors can become long-time partners with you in your child's journey into adulthood.  Even close friends can play an important role in your child's life as surrogate "aunts", "uncles", and "grandparents", when blood relations in these areas are lacking or nonexistent. 
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    CAROL GARY

    Homeschooling since 2000, Carol shares in her blog observations, confessions, information, and musings that help provide perspective and inspiration for homeschooling moms.

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  • Home
  • CORE LEVELS
    • 1) Mentoring Program
    • 2) Group Mentoring >
      • Purchase Sessions
    • 3) Premier Program
  • OPTIONAL LEVELS
    • 4) Store + Resources >
      • TBH Affiliate Store
      • Home School Legal Defense Association
      • HSLDA Compassion
      • 10 Top Mentoring Benefits
      • Know Jesus
    • 5) Private Consultation
    • 6) LEAD OTHER MOMS
  • Testimonials
  • Blog
  • About
    • Invite Carol to Speak
  • Contact