WORKING OUT THE WEED

During one of our many walks to and from the NIH for daily labs and treatments last summer, Evan and I observed a large weed that was taking over one of the beautiful flower gardens in front of the Children's Inn.  He bent over and started searching around for the very base of the weed and then it took A LOT of effort to pull the whole thing out by the roots!  We did not realize how deeply embedded it was or how large it was until he started to force it out.  The proof is in the photos!

Isn't that the way spiritual roadblocks and character issues are with our kids?  We see something that is a little concerning and wind up realizing that it is just the tip of the iceberg; that something much deeper has taken root in our child's heart.  Having one of those moments can be very discouraging.  After all, we are pouring every resource we have into our child's life and think, "Really?  How did THAT get there?"

But take heart, moms.  Remember that there is no issue that can stand up to the power of praying parents who are tuned into the ongoing needs of their family.  Also remember that the enemy attacks often times when he sees the good work you are doing in the lives of your children, so take heart when you face all kinds of trials.  Sound familiar? (James 1:2-5)

When character or behavioral issues crop up, remember that loving consistency and appropriate discipline are best used as a package deal. 

• Always reinforce your love for your child while making sure they understand the boundaries that must be respected.  Even when mistakes are made they are ALWAYS your child whom you love even if you are correcting their behavior.  In fact it is because you love them that you discipline them in order to repair your FELLOWSHIP with them.  Yet your RELATIONSHIP with them is never broken. 
• Stay the course and be consistent in whatever the issue is that needs to be addressed.  It is especially critical that your child receives the same feedback and interaction from mom as they do from dad.  It is also important that children be given the same boundaries at the appropriate ages.  Decide in advance what rules are universal for all of your children and which ones may vary depending on the age of the child so that there is consistency among the siblings as well.
• Do the work to figure out where this behavior is coming from.  Just like the weed in the photo, if you just trim off the visible part of the problem (i.e. the outward behavior) without addressing the inward heart issues (i.e. the root system), the problem has not been fully addressed and may come manifest itself in a more severe way in the near future.

​Remember that certain heart issues will resolve themselves over time while others need a concerted plan to address them.  Either way, as you homeschool your children look for opportunities to work on these "heart problems" as they arise.  Sometimes it is better to set the academics aside (they are probably not listening or doing what they need to do for school at that moment anyway!) until these types of problems are identified and acknowledged so that improvement or even healing can be more quickly achieved.
Read The Power of a Praying Parent by Stormie O'Martian to help both you and your spouse focus on a variety of different priorities for your child's overall well-being and development. The chapters can easily be covered over the course of one month.  Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp is also a great resource for parents to utilize.